Beloved Milton. If you are reading this it is because I have gone to fulfill an obligation to which I committed myself long ago. I'd hoped to be married, to be your bride. Funny how dreams can come and go like that. What you have in your hands is a copy of my personal diary. Although I cannot be yours in body I can still give you this, my legacy. I suppose I've been a wild child, testing everything I could because I knew it would come to this, I guess I knew I had only fourteen years of freedom to live life to its fullest, and I have. Right now I'm off to the Patriarch's harem to be a nameless concubine in the name of interclan diplomacy. I hope I can make a difference somehow, I so wish men and Kzin would put aside their bloated egos and come together in harmony. I think that's the last dream I have left, perhaps the Goddess will see fit to grant me this but I've learned not hold my breath. Although I regret that it will not be your cubs I will love and raise as my own please wish me good fortune as I wish you the same. Enclosed in the box to which I hope I had a chance to give you a key is the ruby tiara I wore for you on my brow. I had bought it to adorn myself as a married woman when the day came but Kzinrettes in the presence of the Patriarch are allowed only the clothing they are given. Consider it a gift of goodwill for I will not forget your kindnesses and your beautiful spirit. I hope you find her someday Milton, I know you have it in you to be her Hero when she needs you and she'll be the luckiest female in the galaxy to be mated to the last of the decent men. Fare thee well.

To my mother I leave my Shrine, in thanks for her guidance, the little gloves she sewed for me in thanks for her unyielding love, and the string of ears in honour of her legacy as a warrior.

To R'Merr I leave that Holocalendar and my modelling portfolio. He always told me how beautiful I was even when I didn't believe it myself.

To S'Varr I leave my fragrances, think of me now and again?

To Sarah Blackfeather I leave my drum, shawl and mask and teddy cougar. She supported me in the ways my mother could not from afar.

To Captain Lee I leave my 20th century baseball with the Babe Ruth autograph. He's the first man who ever rebuffed my foolish advances and I thank him for his wisdom.

To Commander t'Resan I leave my Kama Sutra. Go get that man girl!

To Commander Tempres I leave a nanny service. I hope Fran serves you well Demian, you were a lot of fun, Goddess' blessings to your children and I've set up a little education fund to provide for their future. And Dem, remember no alcohol for the children until they're at least 18.

And lastly to you my love Milton, I leave my father's wtsai. You alone are male enough to have and hold it. Goddess bless.